RHB20230220 - Fighting for the romance¶
I fondly remember the first year that I started teaching. I had moved from software engineering and I can recall the purpose that I felt in those first few months. I was no longer doing mindless computer work but I was now a part of shaping the future of the world. My work had become incredibly meaningful in a short space of time and I loved it. Don't get me wrong, that first year of teaching was rough. I had no idea how to do anything; how to plan a term, how to set a test/exam, or how to herd 1000 headless chickens driving backward in a bus. You know, the usual teacher tasks. But I felt for the first time in a long time that my work had purpose.
When I started I didn't know anyone or anything and I was driven by the exciting novelty of learning everyone's names, sharing who I was and what I enjoyed, pushing strong students, and supporting weaker students. I was driven to be a great teacher. But over the years, I became complacent. I became "one of the staff" and I became the one welcoming new people. The excitement had worn off, I stopped trying as hard and resentments started to creep in due to unresolved conflict. Then I moved to Reddam and all that disappeared and I got to start all over again. Everything was new again! The excitement had returned.
Now I am two years in at Reddam. I am slowly becoming "one of the staff" and I am starting to welcome new people. I have to be vigilant not to slip into that "same old, same old" mentality. Just last week I caught resentments slipping in, particularly with some of the grade 7's. And resentment, as with any relationship, kills the classroom. It leads to not wanting to try new things. It leads to writing students off and not making an effort for them.
I constantly try to remind myself that we literally hold young people's lives in our hands. It is an incredibly powerful thing, to be a teacher. We are the bows that shoot students like arrows into the world. Once they leave our care we can no longer influence where they travel, but we hope that we have aimed them well enough. We can never give up on those in our care. Just like it takes hard work to keep the romance alive in a romantic relationship so it is with keeping the excitement alive in our classrooms.
What prevents you from trying in the classroom? Are you tired? Are you not appreciated? Is it not new anymore? Do you have resentment towards students? Towards other staff?
A question that I am reflecting on this week is: "How does one keep romance alive in teaching?"
Love,
Cliff